Re: Staying-up

作者: PuzzleSong (迷宮組曲) 看板: feeling
標題: Re: Staying-up
時間: Sun Sep 4 10:53:39 2005

應要求的中文版。 =.= （要命）

"It's not your fault, honey." She had had me in her arms kissing my tears away while saying those words. "They are the truely dirty beings, instead." It was the first time in my life that I talked about the violated by cousins for two years since a three-year-aged little girl, after we're together for years.

「親愛的，這不是妳的錯。」
她將我擁入懷中這麼說，並一邊吻去我的淚。
「他們才是真正骯髒的傢伙。」
那是這輩子首次談論到從還是個三歲女娃兒開始被堂哥們性侵害兩年的事情，
我們在一起了幾年之後。


Staying up all night with screens of The L Word in my room all dark, I can't endure, at this moment ultimately, anything more about the tears dropping down through my face, which have been forcing me to face sorrow all alone.

在全然漆黑房中徹夜無眠看著一幕幕The L Word，
直到這一刻，我無法再承受更多滑落面頰的眼淚，
那些總是不間斷地驅使著我獨自面對悲傷的淚水。


Should I be glad that finally I found the TRUE reason why I'm so absolutely sure that I both CAN'T and WON'T fall in love again in this life? It's not due to my illness, my sorrow, my unstableness or any what but simply because of hopeless toward love and human being.

是否該為了終於發現如此肯定這一生無法並且再也不會陷入愛戀的真實原因感到高興？
不是因為我的病、我的憂傷、我的不安於室或者任何藉口，
只是單純地對於愛情以及人類感到絕望。

I had myself clearly seen by me, myself. So what? Still am I a dirty bitch! Ever since then, I was meant to be a dirty bitch with all my fault ever and a day.

明明白白的看清自己。那又如何？我仍是個破婊子。
在那件事情之後，我注定就是一個永遠骯髒的賤人。


It was all my fault. As my cousins ejaculated semen into my mouth and ordered me to swallow it up again and again, they said it's all my fault and that's the punishment just right for me. It was all my fault. After my girlfriend failed in making me drowned in making love, she complained it's all my fault that I can't enjoy a pure love-making either with orgasm or making her orgasm again and again. It is drastically all my fault that I WAS and AM keeping on loving her after suffering happened once and once again.

都是我的錯。
當堂哥們一次又一次要我將射入口中的精液吞下，
他們說這完全是我犯了錯所應得的懲罰。

都是我的錯。
在女友無法令我沉浸於性愛中的挫敗後，
她埋怨著我一再無法享受純粹性愛中不論感受高潮或者令她高潮，都是我的錯。

在一次又一次的煎熬之後仍然持續愛著她，徹徹底底更是我的錯。


It's a good name, THE L WORD, I have to say. Ｌove betrays as Ｌust comes. Ｌovers' honeyed words are totally Ｌies as one hugs tightly saying "It's not your fault, honey."

我不得不說，THE L WORD真是好片名。
當慾望浮現之時愛便開始背棄初衷。
當某人緊擁著妳說著「親愛的，這不是妳的錯。」這樣的情話根本就是謊言。


It suffers that love still exists after hurt takes plece time after time but I just can't help.

在傷害一次次發生後仍然懷著愛意，這令人煎熬，而我卻無能為力。

--
翻譯自己的文章還真是去他堂哥的機車！